Collaborative Divorce

Ask an Expert: What really are the differences between using the collaborative process rather than going to court?

There are a lot of reasons why so many people are choosing to resolve matters arising on separation outside of the court system. Some of the big ones include: 1. Confidentiality. Many personal and financial details can otherwise become part of the filed documents. 2. Creativity. Working together offers many more options regarding how to […]

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Ask an Expert: How can I not win and still be successful in my divorce?

Ending a marriage is one of the most difficult things someone can face. It can throw a couple into turmoil, often bringing the whole family into chaos—at least for a time. Divorcing couples can be defensive, protective, and feel pressure to “best” the other spouse in negotiations, especially if entering into our adversarial court system, […]

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Ask an Expert: I’m getting divorced. How can I prepare myself to move forward more positively?

Research shows there are three preconditions for positive change. First, something must motivate an individual to want to change. Second, a different relationship that provides psychological safety, empathy, and attunement must exist (like with a divorce coach). Third, there must be optimal anxiety—just the right amount of discomfort in the present to want to move […]

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Ask an Expert: Focus on children at Christmas.

Recently, when discussing plans for Christmas with my family, we talked about how kids may experience the holidays when their parents have recently separated or are having relationship difficulties, which can be heightened over the holidays. With so much focus on the “business” of Christmas and on the problems parents are facing themselves, the fact […]

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Ask an Expert: When divorcing, do you really want a pit bull/barracuda lawyer?

Depending on the circumstances, a strongly aggressive approach in family matters can bring results—though you will not control the nature of those results—and there is a huge cost to families. Sometimes a perceived need to win or to see justice be done can overcome the ability to appreciate the long term effects of a court […]

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Ask an Expert: I am recently separated. My spouse and I don’t want a nasty divorce. What can I do?

It’s important to think about the range of options available to you right off the bat. Most people are now aware that court does not have to be where to start. Mediation is an excellent option for those wanting facilitated communication. For those who want guidance around options for settlement and legal information as they […]

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Ask an Expert: What is a Collaborative Divorce?

Collaborative Divorce is a respectful process for resolving conflict, with the help of specially trained lawyers and other professionals, without going to court. Each spouse is represented by his or her own lawyer from start to finish, with the additional support of helping and financial professionals as required. The spouses and professionals work cooperatively to […]

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Ask an Expert: How can the Collaborative Process work if my spouse and I don’t agree or trust each other?

Many people believe that the Collaborative Process works only for those who are amicable and who agree on almost all issues. In fact, this process is ideal for those cases where communication has broken down, where trust is low and where many issues remain to be resolved. Coming to agreement when people look at things […]

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